Review: Errant Pen Lid, Red

On test, pushed some of our testers beyond the realms of rational thought

What’s being tested?

The second red pen lid you’ve found in less than a week.

What we found

Pros: Our testers found that there were no benefits to finding a red pen lid without at least some knowledge of the whereabouts of its original pen partner, or being aware of a lidless red pen in the vicinity. Seeing a red pen lid reunited with the actual red pen it was betrothed to is a truly wonderful thing.

Cons: Implies at least two red pens without proper cappage; alternatively, implies that you’ve lost the same pen lid twice, unless the first pen lid found was subsequently stored in a secure environment, if not reunited with its parent pen. Intensely irritating; implies that someone, at some point, has used a red pen, which rails against conventional thinking on the subject.  Being incredibly specific in its application, a red pen lid holds no other function than lidding red pens; a subsequent, additional red pen cap increases the amount of lidless red pens required. Simply disposing of the pen lid results in the almost instantaneous appearance of its parent red pen, which our testers found engendered a terrible sense of frustration and regret in the disposee.

Verdict

If you’re able to rejoin both pen and pen lid, we would recommend this, as the feeling is almost intensely satisfying. Otherwise, there is little to be said for a solitary red pen cap, other than cuss words and unpleasant hand gestures. Many of our testers became extremely prejudiced towards the loose lids, blaming them for several non-sequiter situations, like the poor trade in value received for Vauxhall Corsas over a year old, and the growing unrest over the increasing fictionalisation of grammar groups. Avoid.

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